Snortle And Puff

I am very tired today as I got very little sleep last night.  My fairly new "bounce-back" pillow seemed suddenly to have been hewn from a block of concrete and my down filled mattress topper had morphed into a sheet of corrugated iron.

Tossing and turning, checking the clock every hour to see how long I had been awake, I only managed a few short dozes here and there.

On the occasions when my fizzing brain eventually began to slow down and all those random, irrelevant thoughts stopped bouncing around and gradually merged into a foggy blur, I was inevitably launched back into full wakefulness by the arrival of my old friends, Snortle and Puff.

These are the noises that P makes in his sleep. He doesn't snore, but his constant nasal congestion (sorry, too much detail probably), means that his breathing is disturbed during sleep and results in sudden, random loud snorts when beathing in and then a heavy puff of air when exhaling.

Ah, but you are deaf, I hear you exclaim.  How can you hear it?

Well,  yes, I am extremely hard of hearing. Not totally deaf, I do have some residual hearing, and I can get by during the day if I wear my hearing aids. At night, without my hearing aids, I cannot hear sounds such as the ticking clock,  water running in the basin, rain on the window, the doorbell, smoke alarm or telephone etc but somehow those snortling, puffing noises seem to be able to get through and annoy the hell out of me when I am desperately trying to get to sleep.

I have tried putting cotton wool in my ears at night to block the sound but that doesn't seem to help.  Sometimes I think that I must be imagining it but that doesn't help me get to sleep.

Luckily, on those nights when I am not suffering from insomnia the noises don't bother me. 

At least I no longer have to get up early to go to work.




27 comments:

  1. I don't know about irregular verbs but irregular snorts can be exceptionally disturbing. Last time I as in hospital I slept soundly through a medical emergency and two heavily snoring patients. The next night there was a chap who snorted....silence.....grumph.....silence and so with various random noises the night carried on. The anticipation drove me bonkers.

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    1. Exactly, Graham! It is that sense of just waiting in the period of silence that you know is going to be broken but you don't know when and you just know it will be before you have had the chance to go to sleep.

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  2. There's nothing worse than a sleepless night. I know what you mean about the bed and pillow becoming a brick! As you say though, at least you don't have to get up for work and I'm sure a nap during the day won't do you any harm either! Fingers crossed for a comfy sleep tonight! x

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    1. Happily it does not happen every night, otherwise I may become guilty of mariticide!

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  3. For a couple of years my wife timed my snorts. They were 19 seconds apart. I now use a mouth device that helps tremendously. Alas, I also now sleep alone.

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    1. I wonder whether snorts at regular intervals would be easier to tolerate than those irregular ones? Perhaps I just need more effective ear plugs - or move to a new house!

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  4. That's a great picture of you JayCee. Did you do it yourself? I note that you have no eyebrows. Have you ever considered eyebrow transplants? Furthermore, you do not appear to have ears which of course may explain your hearing difficulties.

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    1. You are very observant YP.

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    2. Usually I sleep like a log but once in a while sleep evades me. After an hour or so of lying there I get up and come downstairs for a mug of tea and two McVities "Ginger Nuts" - maybe go on the computer for half an hour or dig into BBC World News on the TV. Normally I am ready for sleep after that.

      By the way, where is that scallywag Northsider today? Probably harvesting his cannabis plants in the polytunnel!

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    3. Yes he has been missing today. Hope he is OK.

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  6. I grab that pillow and move out when those snorts become unbearable. Use rather sleep on the couch or the spare bed. Earphones,youtube and roll on sunrise!

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    1. Yep. I think the next time it happens I shall head for the sofa with my pillow.

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  7. After suffering Tom's snoring for a long time we finally agreed to sleep in separate rooms. Ahhhhhhh, bliss, I now sleep really well.
    Briony
    x

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    1. Lucky you! I don't think that option would go down too well with P. I shall just have to make do with the sofa x

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  8. Why don't you and P get bunk beds Jaycee?

    A nice night cap helps you sleep.

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    1. I'd still be able to hear him!
      A couple of glasses of vino each night may help 😉

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  9. Selectively hard of hearing. Like my grandma.

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    1. Oh, Tasker. If I could choose not to hear it, I would!!

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  10. It is recognised by the medical profession and many millions of couples around the world that the best way to get a good night's sleep is in separate rooms.

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  11. JayCee, your description does sound a bit like snoring to me! Could it be some type of sleep apnea? Has he had it checked out? Hope you sleep well tonight!

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    1. Thanks Ellen. I have just had a great night's sleep. I don't think anything could have woken me last night!

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  12. I, the Tigger, know all about not sleeping. F just stopped wearing some patches that keep her sane and well regulated. Now sleeping curled up against her tummy is like leaning on a full blast radiator in midsummer, then all the bedding gets kicked off, then her arms and legs won't stay still. Talk about toss and turn. It's enough to drive a cat to howling off the balcony. I tried pinning her down this morning by sitting on her tummy, but she was not in the least grateful. Ocassionally I have to pat her on the face to stop her making that piffing noise too. She's not best grateful for that either. I hope you get better sleep tonight. xxx Mr T

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    1. Oh, Mr T, I do so understand. P likes to run marathons in his sleep with his legs kicking out in all directions. We now have twin beds to save me from excessive bruising 😁

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  13. My husband snores as well. I suspect I do too, but am not awake to hear me. I can generally deal with it, but sometimes in the night, he will roll over and throw an arm over me, and begin snoring right above my ear. That is a problem. So is his tendency to 'march' in his sleep. His feet move like he is walking somewhere. That drives me crazy. I usually have to get up when he's on the move.

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    1. P suffers from a form of parasomnia called RBD (REM Sleep Behaviour Disorder) which means that the normal relaxation of muscles during sleep does not happen and he acts out his dreams. It can be quite alarming sometimes!

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Although I am quite used to talking to myself, any comments on my posts are very welcome, provided they are not abusive. I do reply to them so please check back. It's good to talk (!)